The Internet's Worst Chicken Flew into My Mouth

Chen Nuo opened the silver packet. The smell escaped. A dying pothos on the windowsill seemed to make its final decision and dropped another leaf. “Golden color. Promising crunch,” he recited, lifting one cracker. The light flickered. Dark-gold letters appeared across its surface, as though written directly into his vision with boiling syrup. [MONSTER RECIPE: GENERAL CRUNCH, INCOMPLETE] [BASE: Rejected chicken flavor.] [CATALYST: One bite of actual chicken.] [PRICE: Pursue every aroma trying to escape.] [RIDDLE-HEART: Missing.] Below the text crouched a thumb-sized yellow chicken wearing a pot-lid helmet and carrying a toothpick spear. It raised one tiny middle feather at him. Chen Nuo fell silent. The chat rejoiced.