The Internet's Worst Chicken Flew into My Mouth

“Last time a sponsor asked you to call its diet soda healthy, you put its lab report on-screen.” “That's called professional ethics.” “That's why your sponsorship is worth five hundred yuan.” The call ended just as someone knocked. His landlady, Tang Xiaoman, stood outside in an apron that promised FULL FORTUNE—BAD FOOD, MONEY BACK. In one hand she held a rent notice whiter than her expression. “Professor Chen,” she said with the smile of a debt-collection mascot, “if you can't pay tonight, my snack shop needs a prep cook who can dice onions without crying.” Chen Nuo hid the carton behind him. “After tonight, I may be the man who redefines chicken flavor.” “Start by defining the 3,200 yuan you owe me.” At eight, the stream began.